What Would Jesus Buy?

In the new documentary "What Would Jesus Buy?", produced by Morgan Spurlock (of "Super Size Me" fame), Reverend Billy and the 35-person strong Stop Shopping Gospel Choir preach a message of anti-consumerism. They make a good point, after all - the Jesus of the gospels seems like he would be very much against our rampant consumerism and fascination with shopping malls and one-click ordering. Shouldn't we be selling all our possessions, slipping through eyes of needles, and decrying these dens of thieves, or is the prosperity gospel the true teaching of Christ?

Apparently one of the hurdles for the creators of the documentary is finding a way to market and sell something so firmly against marketing and selling. And how do you get Wal-Mart to put your film on its shelves when the main character has performed an exorcism on the chain's Arkansas headquarters?

Clearly, this film shares my sense of humor. Read more from the Union Tribune. Thanks to Scott for the link!

Update (11/24/2007): Check out "Jesus Hates Coffee" on Current, and see Reverend Billy exorcise Starbucks of its demons.

Why God Never Received Tenure

I got this joke in one of my daily Beliefnet emails, and thought I'd re-post it here.

Why [the Judeo-Christian] God never received tenure at any university:

1. He only had one major publication.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. It wasn't published in a referred journal.
5. Some even doubt He wrote it Himself.
6. It may be true that He created the world, but what has He done since then?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating His results.
9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.
10. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, He deleted them from the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.
13. Some say He had His son teach the class.
14. He expelled His first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed His tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountaintop.